Filed under: New Life
耶穌說:“我來了,是要叫羊得生命,並且得的更豐盛。”
(約翰福音10:10)
Jesus said: “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” (John 10:10)
耶穌說:“我來了,是要叫羊得生命,並且得的更豐盛。”
(約翰福音10:10)
Jesus said: “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” (John 10:10)
當我還不認識耶穌時,任意行自己所喜悅的事,效法身邊年輕人的作爲。我喜歡開快車,以與別人賽車得勝爲樂。每當覺得心靈空虛時,我便出外找人賽車,在公路上簡直無法無天,不顧別人的安危。儘管出了幾次小車禍,多次刮花別人的車子,有一次還閙上警局,我都不怕,繼續當我的路霸。
我喜歡很晚以後和朋友出去喝茶聊天,不顧家人擔心。每到重要節日就跟同學參加瘋狂派對,玩到早晨四五點才回家,滿身滿頭的煙味。在派對中,親眼看到年輕人抽煙、酗酒、甚至嗑葯、亂搞男女關係,沉迷在短暫的歡樂中。
雖然我的生活在別人眼中看似多姿多彩,可是每當短暫的快樂消失後,我又回到空虛不滿中,因此想盡辦法企圖得到別人的認同和注意,花了很多時間、金錢來裝飾自己,甚至把學校和教會當成是展示自己的場所,借此得到滿足。不止如此,我每天泡在網絡世界中,以不同的身份和數不盡的陌生人聊天,或熬通宵講電話,在虛幻中創造完美的自己。在現實中,我卻是一個可以隨時對著父母破口大駡,完全不顧他們感受的不孝女。是一個輕視自己,非常自卑,多次想結束自己生命的女孩,長期活在黑暗中,不能自拔。
完成兩年高級文憑課程後,我遠赴英國牛津布魯克斯大學就讀本科最後一年。當時是外公和小舅舅陪同我一起到英國。他們最挂心的就是給我找教會。結果,無意中發現了“牛津華人教會”——牛津這個小城市中唯一的華人教會。我開始參加他們的周日崇拜、團契聚會。當初帶領我去團契的弟兄後來成了我的丈夫。
在團契中,我認識了主耶穌,真正了解原來這位創造掌管宇宙萬物、賜生命氣息的神,竟然降生爲人,爲我們的過犯而死,我們還能靠著耶穌得勝罪惡。想想都已經渡過了無數個聖誕節、受難日和復活節,卻不知道耶穌死在十字架上,三天後又復活了,到底與自己有什麽關係。 也不曉得將來公平公義的神要來審判世上所有的人,按著他們所做所想,就連隱藏的,思想上的惡,都要擺在祂面前。想想看,有誰在神面前站立得住,有誰未曾在行爲或思想上違背公義和良心!但祂也是慈愛的神,不願我們走向沉淪,與祂永遠隔絕,最終進入永火中。爲了救我們脫離罪惡和將來的憤怒,救主耶穌在十架上成爲我們的贖罪祭、挽回祭,使信祂的人得救,與神和好,成爲神的兒女,享有豐盛的新生命,一生有神的帶領和保守。祂的復活表明祂已戰勝了死亡和罪的權勢,我們不再懼怕!
真正認罪悔改,是在2003年的5月。當時心靈上承受極大的傷痛,在最難過的那一刻,我所行的惡好像一部電影一樣,一幕幕地出現在腦海中。那時我想的竟然不是得罪我的人有多可惡,而是我以前的所作所爲是如何傷了家人的心,如何得罪神。我獨自在宿舍房間裡痛哭流涕,跪下禱告向神認罪。接著,就撥長途電話回家,向家人認錯,請求他們原諒。
從那次的經歷以後,我感覺自己開始有了轉變。尤其是在放假回家時,家人都很驚訝我和以前大有不同了,便知道神應允了他們的祷告!我開始渴望參加每一個聚會——團契、禱告會、小組查經、崇拜、佈道會等等。以前無論是誰怎麽邀請我,我都不願參與任何聚會,只是習慣性地跟著家人每周参加主日崇拜,聼了講道,也完全不明白聖經的教導與我何干。
漸漸地,我不再喜好賽車,不再不顧健康地通宵熬夜看電視劇、不再沉迷於上網聊天、不再早出晚歸、不再參加不正經的派對、不再盲目減肥、不再瘋狂購物、不再對家人無禮,已不再貪戀以前種種惡行。這就是發生在我身上的神跡,是耶穌基督改變了我!透過聖經,我明白單憑信心邀請耶穌進入我們的生命,祂就賜我們權柄有能力得勝罪惡,並有聖靈隨時引導我們如何正確地使用神所賜的自由意志,去做對的選擇,走正確的路。
通過聚会、讀經、禱告、事奉和學習過討神喜悅的生活、學習愛人,我的靈命漸漸成長,感到滿足快樂;當我不順服神,不肯放下心中的疑惑和惱怒時,可惡的撒旦魔鬼就來攻擊我,使我陷入失望和沮喪。直到我重新回到神的面前悔改認罪時,才得著釋放、重新得力。無論在舊約或新約中,我都深深體會這位慈愛的天父顧念願意謙卑自己,認罪悔改,與祂和好的人。
我也漸漸明白很多時候我們失去平安,是為自己的不義受苦或不願將艱難痛苦交托給神,卻依靠有罪、有限的自己去尋找出路。結果,不但得不着益處,反而破壞人與人之間的關係,自己、他人都受到傷害。若我們是為著神所喜悅的事——愛神並愛人如己,那心裡必有從神而來的平安喜樂,在世有神的祝福及得救的保證,將來有永恒美好的家鄉,神要擦去我們一切的眼淚,永享安息!
2004年聖誕節那天,我在家鄉的教會中,在家人朋友的見證下,接受救主耶穌成爲我生命的主宰,願意一生跟隨祂。一周後,我和那位弟兄在家鄉的教會中,在神和家人的見證下,立約成爲夫婦。後來神帶領我們到了澳洲悉尼,又預備我讀兩年的碩士課程,開始了另一個留學生活。在這幾年中,我在學習、工作、教會事奉、夫妻相處中,親身經歷了神的愛、恩典及保守。並深深體會以下這首詩歌所帶出的信息:
在壓力中仍能平靜,
在忙碌中仍能悠閑,
在失敗中仍能歡笑,
在逼迫中仍能屹立,
上帝的兒女何等有福。
******************************
在絕望中仍有盼望,
在冷漠中仍有關懷,
在困境中仍有出路,
在死亡中仍有生命,
上帝的兒女何等有福。
願您同得這美好的福分!
你的仇敵若餓了,就給他吃;若渴了,就給他喝。因為你這樣行,就是把炭火堆在他的頭上。你不可為惡所勝,反要以善勝惡。(羅馬書12:20-21)
If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:20-21)
愚妄人所行的,在自己眼中看為正直;惟智慧人肯聽人的勸教。
愚妄人的惱怒立時顯露;通達人能忍辱藏羞。(箴言12:15-16)
The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens
to advice. A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult. (Proverbs 12:15-16)
我們沒有帶甚麼到世上來,也不能帶甚麼去,只要有衣有食,就當知足。但那些想要發財的人,就陷在迷惑、落在網羅和許多無知有害的私慾裡,叫人沉在敗壞和滅亡中。貪財是萬惡之根!有人貪戀錢財,就被引誘離了真道,用許多愁苦把自己刺透了。(提摩太前書6:7-10)
For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (1 Timothy 6:7-10)
原來我們在許多事上都有過失;若有人在話語上沒有過失,他就是完全人,也能勒住自己的全身。我們若把嚼環放在馬嘴裡,叫牠順服,就能調動牠的全身。 看哪,船隻雖然甚大,又被大風催逼,只用小小的舵,就隨著掌舵的意思轉動。 這樣,舌頭在百體裡也是最小的,卻能說大話。看哪,最小的火能點著最大的樹林; 舌頭就是火,在我們百體中,舌頭是個罪惡的世界,能污穢全身,也能把生命的輪子點起來,並且是從地獄裡點著的。 各類的走獸、飛禽、昆蟲、水族,本來都可以制伏,也已經被人制伏了; 惟獨舌頭沒有人能制伏,是不止息的惡物,滿了害死人的毒氣。 (雅各書3:2-8)
We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. (James 3:2-8)
人若賺得全世界,賠上自己的生命,有甚麼益處呢?人還能拿甚麼換生命呢?(馬太福音16:26)
What good will it be for you to gain the whole world, yet
forfeit your soul? Or what can you give in exchange for your soul? (Matthew16:26)
愛情不是口裏的甜蜜,
愛情不求自己的歡喜;
愛是接納全部的你,
愛是忘記受傷的回憶。
(天韻詩歌《兩個環》副歌)
愛情,眾水不能息滅,大水也不能淹沒,若有人拿家中所有的財寶要換愛情,就全被藐視。(雅歌8:7)
Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away.
If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love, it would be utterly scorned. (Song of Solomon 8:7)
污穢的言語,一句不可出口,只要隨事說造就人的好話,叫聽見的人得益處。(以弗所書4:29)
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but
only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29)
不要為明天憂慮,因為明天自有明天的憂慮; 一天的難處一天當就夠了。
(馬太福音6:34)
Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about
itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:34)
凡事都可行,但不都有益處。凡事都可行,但不都造就人。
(哥林多前書10:23)
“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not
everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive.
(1 Corinthians 10:23)
懶惰人哪,你去察看螞蟻的動作,就可得智慧!螞蟻沒有元帥,沒有官長,沒有君王,尚且在夏天預備食物,在收割時聚斂糧食。懶惰人哪,你要睡到幾時呢?你何時睡醒呢?再睡片時,打盹片時,抱著手躺臥片時,你的貧窮就必如強盜速來,你的缺乏彷彿拿兵器的人來到。(箴言6:6-11)
Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise!
It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest. How long will you lie there, you sluggard? When will you get up from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest— and poverty will come on you like a thief and scarcity like an armed man. (Proverbs 6:6-11)
無論何事,你們願意人怎樣待你們,你們也要怎樣待人。(馬太福音7:12)
So in everything, do to others what you would have them do
to you. (Matthew 7:12)
你們各人都當愛妻子,如同愛自己一樣;妻子也當敬重她的丈夫。
(以弗所書5:33)
Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself,
and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33)
愛是恆久忍耐,又有恩慈;愛是不嫉妒,愛是不自誇,不張狂,不做害羞的事,不求自己的益處,不輕易發怒,不計算人的惡,不喜歡不義,只喜歡真理;凡事包容,凡事相信,凡事盼望,凡事忍耐;愛是永不止息。(哥林多前書13:4-8)
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not
boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)
喜樂的心,乃是良藥;憂傷的靈,使骨枯乾。
(箴言17:22)
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit
dries up the bones. (Proverbs 17:22)